MERRY CHRISTMAS 2023

 RONALD AND BERYL JUST

HAZELMERE VILLAGE

31 EUCALYPTUS AVENUE

ELI WATERS, QLD, 4655

AUSTRALIA.

December 11, 2023

 

Merry Christmas to our family and friends

  

It seems incredible that it is only a matter of days until Christmas Day. This year seems to have flown by, and we have been kept busy with all sorts of activities this year. There have been plenty of activities in our over 50s-residential village: outdoor and indoor bowls and other Village social events, and involvement in the community and in our church, not to mention the regular visits to local specialists and every three months to Wesley Private Hospital in Brisbane, for outpatient reviews by Ron's clinical immunologist.

One of the highlights of 2022 was Ron's 80th birthday celebrations. Family and friends came from overseas and from Western Australia. Ron has continuous treatment for his hypogammaglobulinemia. Every 21 days he travels across to Maryborough (a 70 km round trip) to have an IM penicillin injection. The following day he has a 5-hour infusion of human immunoglobulin at St Stepen's Private Hospital, Hervey Bay. This infusion is administered every 21-days. He is heavily dosed with other drugs, antibiotics and strong painkillers daily. Fortunately Beryl is keeping reasonably well, her main treatment is for Diabetics Type II. Ron also is reviewed by a clinical hematologist who comes up from Wesley Hospital about twice a month. We are constantly experiencing extreme tiredness, so we often assess the amount of activities we are involved with.

Beryl plays outdoor bowls three mornings a week and indoor bowls on Sunday afternoon. Beryl is the treasurer of our church and is also a musician and a committee member for our church craft group. Beryl is assistant leader of a ladies Bible study called KYB (Know Your Bible). Ron is busy every second Thursday afternoon with JP duties at Stocklands shopping centre, every 6-weeks at the local base hospital and occasionally. assist at the local courthouse, not including many people in the suburb who need a JP. He has duties at church: worship leader every three weeks, preacher about every three weeks and a member of the pastoral team. Ron is not involved in any activities in the Village. He was playing outdoor bowls up to a few years ago but gave this away due to having falls.

We will be spending Christmas with family on the Gold Coast, staying at the home of Sherryl and Marcus. We will also catch up with other family. We return to Hervey Bay on December 28 in time for Ron to preach the Thanksgiving Service on New Year's Eve.

If you would like to contact us please feel free to contact us on Zoom.

We trust you have an enjoyable Christmas and a safe and happy new year.

Ron and Beryl

 

Looking Forward, Looking Back

The title of this post comes from a country and western song, by Australian music icon, the late Slim Dusty.

As one gets older we tend to reflect on the events that have impacted our lives, and look forward to the future, and probably having a bucket list; things and goals we want to achieve before we pass away.

My life has been impacted by an immune deficiency, called common variable immunodeficiency. This is a rare deficiency and mine is made more rare by having granulomas. So I guess the correct name for my deficiency would be: granulomatous variant of common variable immune deficiency.

The jury is out as to how this deficiency appears in different people. Is it genetic? Is there external factors that causes one to have this immune deficiency? I have not seen any clear evidence one way or the other.

My mother, Mona Dorothy Just, had two sons. My half brother, Francis (Frank) was older than me and he has now passed away, with lung and brain cancer. He and I had the same mother.

I was born quite a few years later, and I had a different father than Frank. My mother gave me away to a work mate when I was a few weeks old. However, she named me, and registered my birth, although the name of my father was not listed.

My foster "mother" took me and probably felt she was doing a favour to my mother and to myself. My foster mother told me when I was a teenager that I was a sickly child and I was not expect to survive at most more than a few childhood years. I recall regularly visiting a GP and being diagnosed with asthma, upper respiratory infections, pleurisy, pneumonia and other infections. I believe that this was not a correct diagnoses but was caused by my immune deficiency.

During teenage years, and on into adulthood I suffered from continual infections, as well as classic migraine. I was not a healthy person, but was determined as I got older, that I was going to make the most of my life. This determination was also underpinned by the fact that my time in the foster home were not happy years for me, and I was pleased for the chance when I was 16 years of age, to leave home and live in various boarding homes, until I met and married my first wife Therese Mary Roberts (Tess). I married when I was almost 19 years of age. Our marriage ended on 15 March 1982, when Tess passed away with metastatic melanoma. We had five children.

During the 30 months that Tess was treated for this cancer, she had lateral forefoot amputation, and eighteen months later removal of lymph glands from mid thigh to the pubic region. These were times when our faith in Christ was certainly tested. Both Tess and myself had been drawn by the grace of God to respond to his call on our lives and give our lives to Christ. This had a major impact on our lives but I will not pursue this matter at the moment.

In June 1984 I married Beryl Smith and we have lived in happiness until this moment. But my health deteriorated and in 2006 onward I have been treated for this immune deficiency with monthly infusions of human immunoglobulin and injections of penicillin. I have had a number of operations for damage done to the body by this deficiency. We abbreviate the name of this deficiency by using the initials CVID.

Now at almost 73 years of age, my specialists and GP can do not make me better, but they are trying to make me comfortable. I have constant pneumonia, bronchiectasis, pain, oral lichen planus and other problems. I have also had two bouts of lobular hepatitis, which is linked to infection as a result of CVID, as well as removal of gall bladder.

I look back over my life and I am grateful that I have seen my wonderful children grow into fine adults and have secure employment., and living productive lives. My grandchildren could be included in this. Now we have great grandchildren, and we hope they will grow up and live their lives as wonderful people like their parents. I have achieved most of my life goals. I have spent some time studying through a theological seminary and have obtained my degrees. I have been privileged to be involved in community groups and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a JP in New South Wales, New Zealand and Queensland. I was a marriage celebrant in both New Zealand and Australia, but have resigned from this due to ill health.

Beryl and I have been able to do a rail trip on The Ghan; Darwin to Alice Springs on The Ghan train. A wonderful experience, and we often recount this experience and the spectacular landscape and views we saw, as well as visiting Uluru (Ayers Rock). As far as I am concerned, I am content as I have achieved most of things in life that I wanted to achieve.

Apart from my children, grandchildren and great grandchildren I have two sisters, Gail and Margaret. We have the same mother and father. We enjoy each other's company and appreciate each other's family, which is quite extended! It was not until around 1978 that we met face to face and we have gone through good and bad times with our family and friends.

My future bucket list is small. Beryl and I would love to spend some time in the Kimberleys, and do some more touring in Australia. Anything else for me will be a bonus. We are returning to New Zealand for a couple of weeks to visit family and friends in the central North Island. Whether this is the last time we will travel to New Zealand, only time will tell. Health and finances may mean family and friends should come to Australia and visit us.

I bring this to a close. This is be no means exhaustive, but just touches on the very basics of my experience with an incurable immune deficiency. As a preacher I have often encouraged people to place their trust in Christ to get through their daily experiences. I have often quoted the words in the Book of Hebrews where it is recorded that Jesus has said "I will never leave you, or forsake you."

In my life I have experienced the truth of these words and I am prepared to daily trust and lean on Him for comfort and strength.

Contracts or Sacraments

There has recently been considerable discussion among the political parties here in Australia about gay marriage. One party in particular is totally in favour of it, and another political party considers there should be a conscience vote by members of parliament.

In Australia legislation states that "marriage is the union of a man and a woman, to the exclusion of all others, voluntarily entered into for life". Family Law Act 1975 section 43(a), and Marriage Act 1961, section 46(1).

 

There have been calls from some politicians and sections of society to change the definition of marriage in the Marriage Act 1961.

 

I strongly support full legal protection for gay couples but I am also wary of relying on the federal and state government to bring about good and lasting change. It seems to me that the Christian church has a dangerous tendency in both progressives and conservatives to look to the state to effectively mediate theological conflicts through secular legal decisions.

Marriage, for many Christian traditions, is a sacrament, an ordinance, or an otherwise religious expression that identifies a union blessed by God through the Church.

Civil unions and domestic partnerships are legal protections granted and enforced by the state. In my view the state and the Church are and should remain distinct. The state has no claim over Christian sacraments, and the distinction between Church and state threatens to be dissolved by using the language of “marriage” too haphazardly.

Civil unions and domestic partnerships, in so far as they refrain from relying on more nearly sacramental language, are far more appropriate matters for political debate, since they are legal relationships that courts oversee and adjudicate. Marriage as a Christian framework is not so sterile as to be merely legal, and must be deliberated in a very different way than is obviously par for the course in contemporary politics, with its partisan mudslinging and sloganeering.

To find our way forward, we who are Christians must orient ourselves to Christ, in whom we have our being and to whom we are ultimately wed.

After all, if there is “gay marriage” might there not also be “gay communion” or “gay baptism”? No, for the body of Christ, there is neither Jew nor Greek, male nor female, gay nor…

On the contrary, there is one Spirit and one body, though our parts are many. The theological issues that the universal Church has are not the domain of the state, and sorting out our ecclesial differences is not the place of the political authorities.

I believe strongly that the rights afforded by the law should be distributed equally to adult couples who display a willingness to commit to one another in sickness and in health, until death do them part.

Legal partnerships abound in civil law and domestic unions can easily be modelled thereafter, with protections and benefits enforceable through the courts. Contracts are relationally sterile, needing to be as neutral as possible in order to ensure equal representation before an impartial court.

But for Christians the determinative imagery for unions is based upon the marriage of Christ and his bride, the Church.

Jesus is anything but impartial, his mercy exceeding mere justice and impartiality. Christian relationships are not fundamentally contractual, but covenantal. Furthermore, no piece of paper adequately codifies the partnership between people, whether we call them husband, wife, partner, spouse, or any other thing.

Christians (and all Australians) should do everything we can to strengthen the full legal protections for all partnerships. We should work toward ensuring that the marginalization of gay couples and their civil rights will no longer be the rule, but the exception.

We must be careful  how we speak of our relationships. If marriage, let us mean one thing, but if union, another. In France, for example, a religious event and the legal contract are separate; one does not guarantee the other.

We need to be careful not to take our cues from the state or to be beholden to a government to define and enforce our sacraments.  We cannot place ultimate trust in our legal or political institutions, but only in God and the institutions blessed by the Church.

The line is narrow and the balance fine, but must remain distinctive enough to differentiate between the two. The haphazard language I have seen on this issue makes it hard to tell God from country, politics from religion.

There are a myriad of differences between traditions within the church, and we should not rely upon “the authorities” to enforce a flattening universal model for each and every one of us. Let us all work together to strengthen our laws to protect those who need protection, including racial minorities affected one day and LGBT people the next. In everything, let us continue to grow in love for God and learn to distinguish between law and gospel, between God and country.

—
I am grateful for material on this subject written by Logan Mehl-Laituri. I have used his material fairly extensively in this blog, which does reflect my personal view on this subject. Logan Mehl-Laituri is an Iraq veteran and a student in the theological studies program at Duke Divinity School, where he is a founding member of Milites Christi. He also acts as the Executive Officer of Centurion’s Guild and is the author of Reborn on the Fourth of July (InterVarsity Press, 2012).

 

A Roller Coaster Ride Part 3

This will be my third blog since we arrived in Auckland from Brisbane on Monday afternoon, June 17.

We have come to New Zealand primarily to speak a little time with our family, who are living for some months at Ronald McDonald House, Auckland Domain, while seven-year-old Quinn is receiving treatment. Quinn suffered two brain tumors, and has undergone radiation treatment earlier in the year, and currently having chemotherapy treatment, along with stem cell replacement.

New Zealand is in the grip of winter weather, and during last night we experienced thunder and lightning, as well as huge gusts of wind.

We are staying on the 15^th floor of Waldorf Apartments, St Martins Lane, central Auckland, just a 15 minute walk to the hospital and RMH.

The management of Waldorf Apartments make accommodation available at a reduced rate for family and support persons of patients at Ronald McDonald House. The accommodation is excellent and we would highly recommend them to those in the Australasia region who are looking for accommodation for holidays or business.

I am typing this up on my tablet at 8am, Friday morning, just before breakfast. This morning we may go downtown Auckland and early afternoon go back to RMH to catch up with family. Quinn has doctor’s appointments this morning as well as IV antibiotics, blood tests etc.

I have titled my two previous blogs as a Roller Coaster Ride, and this is probably good imagery. Our family has experienced highs and lows in their adventure, and while this roller coaster ride is in progress, there is no way to get off.

In the time we have been with family visiting them at RMH we have observed great kindness and support from other families living in the House and also the kindness and genuine support from the staff. There are other families in the House who are also experiencing horrific situations with a sick child, but they find the time to share their concern and interest of other families and the situation they are experiencing. Hugs and warm wishes happen all around the families in the House. And these are genuine heartfelt expressions of aroha and support.

It is impossible to understand fully the pain parents when their child reacts to treatment, particularly with nausea and vomiting. All they can do is take each day as it comes.

Some of the situations families are experiencing and the sickness of their child have come out of left field, totally unexpected. Deep down they may ask themselves from time to time why this illness is happening to their child, but all the parents we have seen have a positive attitude and for the most part expect the treatment will help their child have a more comfortable quality of life.

We have seen kindness expressed in a practical way by businesses coming to the House and cooking a meal for the families. Often a plate of food has to be taken up the ward in Starship Hospital, as one parent has to be in the ward with their child and this often means sleeping in the room with their child.

Celebrities often come to the House and show their support: sporting celebrities, TV personalities, XFactor contestants and so on.

What will happen today after Quinn is reviewed by her doctor, and the blood test results come back. Will she need a blood transfusion or will she be able to come back to RMH. Well, we will see what unfolds as the day progresses. But one thing is certain, wherever Quinn is she will be surrounded by love and support, and a loving mum , dad and elder sibling who will do whatever is necessary to make each day a happy day for her.

A Roller Coaster Ride Part 2

Yesterday I referred to the support available from Ronald McDonald House. 

We cannot praise this organisation highly enough. Our family is at the Auckland Domain complex. The staff are so kind and provide the help and support that is necessary for the family. Then there is the support from families who are experiencing the same type of difficulties.

This morning’s weather is dismal, and it has been raining overnight. We will go to the Skytower and have a general look around. Then we will go to Ronald McDonald House and find out whether Quinn is back in the House or still in the ward.

The weather for the remainder of the week, particularly lower North Island and South Island is for heavy rain and snow. We expect heavy rain in Auckland this afternoon.

Later: We went to Skytower, even though there was considerable cloud cover.

From there we went to Starship Hospital. Quinn is in the ward. I was close to noon when we arrived and found she was much improved and was to be discharged.

Now Quinn is back at Ronald McDonald House.

It is really a roller coaster ride for Quinn and family!!

A Roller Coaster Ride

Today I sat in a consultation room at Starship Children’s Hospital, in Auckland, New Zealand. The reason we were there is because our youngest grandchild, Quinn, is presently on her second cycle of chemotherapy.

To learn more about Quinn’s journey  link to Quinn’s Quest. 

https://www.google.com.au/search q=quinn's+quest&oq=quinn's+quest&aqs=chrome.0.57j0l3.15161j0&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

This journey began at the beginning of 2013, and at times this has been a horror journey, interspersed occasionally with good times.

As a privileged member of the family, but also an observer it has been heartwrenching to follow this family’s journey.

Quinn had two brain tumours of an aggressive and rare cancer called PNET. After the removal of the brain tumours, a lengthy regime of radiation and chemotherapy began. The family is based in Palmerston North, where they have family and friends.  They have their own home and worked hard to provide for their family and buy their own home. Unfortunately both parents had to leave their jobs, and in one case take a year’s leave without pay.

Quinn has an elder sibling but he has joined his parents in Auckland. The family living in an apartment in Ronald McDonald House.

The period of radiation treatment ended in April, but chemotherapy will go through a number of cycles, along with the infusion of stem cells .until the last quarter of this year.

But it is all extremely hard emotionally and physically for Quinn’s parents. They have been fortunate to have support from family and friends but there is the daily visits to oncology for IV antibiotics, blood tests and for Quinn, the extreme tiredness and general feeling of unwellness because of nausea, the nasal-gastro feeding, the low white cell counts, and the list goes on. Her parents have to spend the hours most days watching their 7-year-old daughter being so ill.

The family has stayed strong as best they can, looking forward to when all this will be over. But it is a rollercoaster ride for all.

But today we observed Quinn’s infusions, her IV antibiotic infusion and the results of today’s blood tests. Her platelets are downs, as is her white blood cells. So at the end of the day Quinn is admitted back into the ward.

We will see what happens in the next day or so.

Remembering our loved ones at Christmas

We Remember Them . . .

It is difficult to find the right words to say to people who have suffered the loss of a loved one. What feelings can I express to you that you have not already experienced.

 Losing someone or something you love is very painful. After a significant loss, you may experience all kinds of difficult and surprising emotions, such as shock, anger, and guilt.

 Sometimes it may feel like the sadness will never let up. While these feelings can be frightening and overwhelming, they are normal reactions to loss. Accepting them as part of the grieving process and allowing yourself to feel what you feel is necessary for healing.

 The loss of a loved one brings forth various emotions. The loss of a child, the loss of a spouse or lifelong companion, the loss of an aged parent, different scenarios but all with an overwhelming and at times a crippling sense of loss and sometimes abandonment.

Sometimes our loved one has passed away, and we still have unfinished business. In these instances it is often worthwhile to get help from a health professional or a Christian minister.

Some of us have been bereaved for some time and we come to these services to remember our loved one and share our memories. Some of us have lost a loved one during this year, and this is the first time they are not with us for Christmas.

We think of our loved ones who are gone from us, we mourn, but we also give thanks for the lives that touched our own in such significant ways…husbands, wives, children, parents, siblings, family, friends… We are better people for having lived and loved with them. Lives end…but faith teaches us that love doesn’t end. Love is eternal and the bonds of love are not broken by death.

St Paul stated: “Now there are faith, hope and love. But of these three, the greatest is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13.

In past generations it was considered that a person must have a “stiff upper lip”, and not show too much emotion. This resulted in people continuing to live their life in pain, depression and with unexpressed grief and often unresolved anger.

But I want to affirm that it is OK to grieve. When we lose a loved one, grief is the natural reaction.

There is no right or wrong way to grieve – but there are healthy ways to cope with pain. You can get through it! Grief that is expressed and experienced has a potential for healing that eventually can strengthen and enrich life.

I would say again: Grief is a natural response to loss. It’s the emotional suffering you feel when something or someone you love is taken away. Some people say “time heals all wounds”. But it is not the passage of time itself that brings resolution, but the way we work through the stages of grief.

Others may tell you to “snap out of it”, or to “get over it”. But sharing grief with a trusted friend or companion can be a healthy release, and a step forward in the healing process.

At the funeral of a loved one we may not feel the depth of pain and sorrow, basically because we are caught up in arrangements of the funeral, the presence of family and friends. But the deep pain of loss can overwhelm us in the times we are alone or in the dark hours of night time.

Grief is love, and it is because we feel such pain – because the inner ache is so great – that we know the depth of our love. Grief simply cannot and does not exist except where there has been love.

Grief is not a mountain to be climbed, with the strong reaching the summit long before the weak. Grief is not an athletic event with stopwatches timing our progress. Grief is a walk through loss and pain. There is no competition and no time trials.

I suggest to you today that we accept the fact that our loved ones have left us. But we need to give them a continuing stake in how we live. In this way, they are not just part of the past in our memories or of the present, but will continue to live and to achieve through whatever we have taken from their lives and added to our own for the benefit of others. And by doing this, we can feel a wonderful closeness to them.

This may be the first Christmas that you are without your loved one. Don’t be afraid to grieve. Grief is an expression of your love. Get support from family and friends. Surround yourself with positive people. Think about, talk about and treasure the memories of your loved one. Heal in your own way and in your own time.

The experience of grief is powerful. So, too, is your ability to help yourself to heal. In doing the work of grieving, you are moving toward a renewed sense of meaning and purpose in your life.

In conclusion: To those who have a Christian faith I want to share this prayer:

God,

you sent Jesus to share our earthly life.

We thank you for Christ’s victory over death.

Help us to share that victory,

and give us the hope to look forward again.

Amen